Things I want to have

Trying to shake off this feeling of being depressed and denied, so though I'd write out this entirely selfish list which probably will reveal more than I want to show about myself, but heck, this is almost anonymous. If I can't be selfish anonymously than I don't know what this blog is for.


So here goes... if I could have it all I'd want..

1) Money- enough not to worry about losing my job.
2) Gorgeous long legs.
3) A tiny waist.
4) Better hair.
5) A well-defined chin.
6) A domestic helper to help out with the housechores.
7) Free flights all year round so I could fly to meet my best friend anytime I want or whisk her off to Europe and hang out and talk and cry and laugh.
8) (Slightly)bigger boobs
9) better psychomotor skills
10) a better ball sense
11) well-defined athletic-looking thighs and arms
12) musical talent
13) really cool expensive furniture
14) my brother still alive and well and me die first before anyone else I love.. but I guess he got that wish first.
15) my husband to stay sweet and nag me less
16) high metabolism
17) photographic memory
18) the gift of eloquence- so people will understand me better and hence irritate me less
19) a superfertile agile strong body- so I can give birth to superfertile gorgeous kind geniuses.
20) to believe without fear.

Ben Pics

Ben kissing his teddy before going to sleep.

Pain, a Great Protector

Something interesting I read yesterday in Placebo by Dylan Evans:


The value of feeling bad is nowhere illustrated than in the case of pain. Pain, as everyone* knows, is a great protector.

... acute pain is beneficial, causing you to move quickly from damaging objects..

..Even more important is the second type of pain (which)is deep and spreading.

..it causes you to keep the wounded area as still as possible, and encourages you to take extra care to shield the area from fresh injury...

The capacity for pain then, confers an advantage on those who have it.


(* everyone, except me, I guess)

Ben

We adopted a kitten last week. His mother had given birth to him and his four siblings outside my mother-in-law's flat 5 weeks ago. I'd never kept any pets before, other than fish, so taking Ben (my kitten) home was a big move. He's really the sweetest thing, brown and white with a bent tail.

Only thing is, he's pretty pampered by now..yes it's only been a week. He was toilet-trained pretty quickly, but gets his way with us pretty much otherwise.

No, I've not given up my dream of having my own child though. I have been trying TCM (traditional Chinese medicine) to regain my health and so far, I see some positive changes.

Will go for an operation in November to 'unblock' my right tube and then try on our own for a year before considering IVF for the second time. We need the rest; physically, emotionally and financially.

Going for a short trip with hubby this weekend. I hope to have some sun,sand,sea and s..