Rant
I feel about ready to explode. I'd lost my Tag Heuer a few days back, not sure when. Then 2 days ago some students stole 90 dollars from my pencil case. Why do I work so hard for these people? I have to wake up at 4 o'clock every morning just to catch up on work and still I feel way behind. My hair's shit. I've developed a mole right between my eyes. I don't need this. I don't want bad things to happen to whoever took these things.I don't want bad things to happen to other people. But I also don't want bad things to happen to me. I hate feeling like a victim. It's hard to believe HE (as in God)cares when I feel so forgotten.
Funny thing is my cat Ben has been really nice to me the past few days. He sidles up next to me all the time and yesterday even rested his head on my legs and slept there. This is very rare. He usually likes to be left alone. It's like he knows. If only cats could talk. I want a baby, so bad. I've been saving up for another IVF round , it's so expensive here.
Sometimes I feel plagued. I try so hard to be happy. Maybe that's it. I should just succumb to this depression. Just cry and cry and not stop. I feel so tired.
Funny thing is my cat Ben has been really nice to me the past few days. He sidles up next to me all the time and yesterday even rested his head on my legs and slept there. This is very rare. He usually likes to be left alone. It's like he knows. If only cats could talk. I want a baby, so bad. I've been saving up for another IVF round , it's so expensive here.
Sometimes I feel plagued. I try so hard to be happy. Maybe that's it. I should just succumb to this depression. Just cry and cry and not stop. I feel so tired.
posted by AnnieSeed at 6:22 PM
1 Comments:
I am unsure on God to an extent, but I do wonder if He talks to me. I started thinking about Him a lot last year, between talking to Hanni and praying for you.
I do think the saying that He "works in mysterious ways" is likely to be true.
Whether He cannot or will not control everything to stop bad things from happening, I do not know. But maybe it's not a coincidence that Ben has taken this time to be closer to you.
Small favours may not be much, but sometimes, they make all the difference.
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